Money is ENERGY

​Well folks! This next one has been on my mind for bloody months now! There has been so many times where I wanted to get into it, and just no time. 

I write this onboard a British Airways flight to Tampa. It’s a nine and half hour journey so this is an adequate amount of time. Hehe! 

This one is all about money, my relationship to it and how money is an exchange of energy not just finances. Now I’m sure if you troll through this riveting occasionally inactive blog, you’ll find other posts where I talk about money. Apologies now if I’m repeating myself. 

Where the hell should I start. Let’s start with Scott Galloway who gets it! (Side note, go read, Notes on Being a Man). He says that when it comes to dating, men should pay for woman. He likes to add that if you go Dutch, how do you expect a kiss  at the end of the night. Yes Scott! jokes and kisses aside, that’s how it should work. When a man pays he is providing for his woman, or in my case. The companion at the time who is just a friend. 

There is something symbolic and deeper when a guy pulls out the card or cash and sorts out the bill. When it comes to housemates, flatmates, I’ve always lived with guys. Even when I go out for dinner now, he pays and later on when we are home I’ll transfer my part, if it’s requested, it’s not always. I’m cool with that. 

Another thing that I have really observed in people over the years is how deeply ingrained their money story is. It is so deep routed. Both my parents came from nothing and it’s interesting watching their financial decisions and how they spend. It’s interesting watching anyone spend to be honest. Maybe even watching how people don’t spend is even more interesting. 

Now I’m very transparent with money, ask me what I make and I’ll tell you. I have a few friends who will answer the question and some who don’t. When it comes to savings or investments, I don’t think anyone has ever answered. Now I don’t need to know this number, it’s none of my fucking business. It’s just context for the next part. How people spend and how generous they are. Again money is energy. 

Let me give some examples of a good energy exchange. I actually think I may have mentioned this is a previous post in the last few years. I’m at the airport gate waiting to board. I end up talking to man about the vending machine misbehaving and not delivering the needed chocolate. Later he found out there was another machine a few gates away. He asked if I could watch his bag, he was on a mission. Before heading off, he asked what I wanted. I’m sure there was a slight delay because I’m always taken back by kindness, however I quickly replied with a Twix please. Soon after he returned with a twix. It’s not about the money, it’s not about the fact that I looked after his bag. It’s an exchange of energy. 

Here is an exchange now of BAD energy, this one has sadly left a bad taste in my mouth. Female friend who has high ambitions to move up the corporate ladder and retire early. (60 from memory). She makes more than her partner and is the primary breadwinner. She looks at her finances and investments regularly. At Christmas she went through all her bank statements to see what she spends in different categories. I leaned this during the restaurant meal. She made the reservation, based on a set menu. A credit card hold was taken for the meal. A few weeks prior I sent over my part as I was budgeting etc. In the end, the meal was a bit more due to the drink or dessert. When the bill came, she paid and then asked for the £8.50 to be transferred over to her later. I did that and knew instantly that this person is not for me. Nice girl, kind, generous with her time. But when it comes to fun, it’s an ick! I don’t know how to explain it. It’s not her role to pay for me. I just know that I wouldn’t ask if I was in the reverse position. My relationships with friends has changed and maybe it’s more about her not being aligned to who I am now. Who knows 

This next bit is not so much the energy of money, but more on the abundance, flow and safety it brings. In February, I had dinner with an old fling. Dabbling took place on 2011, he since got married, had 3 kids and is now divorced. Over the years that have gone by, he worked hard for a Fortune 500 company. His salary at his peak is 8 times what I make in a year! Holy shit! I don’t even know what that feels like. I sure hope to one day. It’s not about the large income, it’s more of what he said. When taking about the hay day and his marriage at the time. He casually said, we never had to think about money. He was not boasting, if was just a simple fact as he’s recounting the past. I can only imagine what that does to the nervous system. The calmness in the body. I can even feel it just thinking about it. It’s safe to say, he paid for our meal. 

As I’m writing, I’m noticing the theme of money and food. I suppose they both nourish. If we go back to hunter gatherer time, there was no money. There was probably some sort of barter system, and when someone was fed that’s an exchange too. 

Wait! I’m suddenly having a lightbulb moment. I’m sure I’ve mentioned this one too. I’m about to see my family in less that 24 hours. This has been a rollercoaster. My dad has always paid for our meals. I’m sorry if I sound like a spoilt brat but I think this is a good thing. I think this is normal, I also don’t take this for granted. I think if you’re going to have offspring. Feed them. Simple. I’m not asking for caviar. My mom on the other hand doesn’t get it. She likes to split the bill. I do it in bewilderment. I think to myself, you fed me from your breast…. And now you can’t??? If any of you are lost. This is clearly a metaphor. 

On the plus side, I have somewhat had money talks with my mom, she is starting to get it. 

This cruise (come back for future posts) is fully inclusive so thankfully there will not be any bills at the end of the meals. 

Here is one more fun meaningful exchange of money (energy) where no money was even spent. The other night I was late night texting with a male friend. It was late and I was starving. He told me to order some food  on an app and he’ll pay for it! OMG I almost fell over but I was in bed. (Actually I was thinking, let me get my knee pads, marry me) In the end, I didn’t order food, but man was I touched. 

Last fun thing about me and my relationship with money. I would like to be mortgage free and have a good amount of savings for retirement, fun and a rainy day. That will come. 

I also want to enjoy what money can buy and bring. My mom always use to say, what’s the point of having china or nice things for special occasions that you almost don’t use. I totally agree with that. Get nice things, use them, enjoy them.

I love jewellery, the real stuff. Simple, elegant, a statement, a solitaire, a gift, an heirloom, something passed down etc. Over the years I’ve met sooooo many people who wear jewellery with a story. So often passed down or a gift from a loved one. Aside from when I was a baby (i wore gold bracelets - it’s a very cool Indian tradition), all my jewellery has been purchased by me. I suppose being single my whole life has not helped in the jewellery department. However, this my friends will be changing next week! I’m sooo excited. There are some beautiful earrings that I’ve wanted the moment I laid eyes on them on Taylor Sheridan TV show. My dad is getting them for me. Not entirely sure of the logistics of it. It’s part gift for sure, maybe full gift or maybe part loan where I’ll pay him back slowly. Whatever the case is, I’m happy. 

I think I’ll wrap this one up, just remember folks, money is energy. When you buy someone a coffee, a pint, an ice cream, chocolate it’s all energy!

Oops! One more story. When you spend money, you can’t expect something in return. You have to give freely. I’ve been buying my housemate an Easter egg every year he has lived with me. And every year without fail, he get gets me nothing. For a few years I use to get annoyed, even angry. Now I give because it’s who I am. It’s what I believe in, it’s what gives me joy. So this year when I gave him his Easter egg, he reached into his kitchen cupboard and gave me a pack of spaghetti. This my friends is progress in my books. 

Love ya

L x