Up up and away

In a few hours time I will be reunited with my bestie. Steph and I have been friends since the ripe old age of 7! Can you believe it, we are still friends after all this time. 

I often wonder what keeps us together or even what it is that keeps us in each others lives. I left Canada when I was 21 and Steph moved to Italy when she was 24. None the less I've gone to see her many a time regardless of where she is. She also spends part of her year in Abu Dhabi due to her husbands job.

Back to my question at had. I'm pretty sure I know the answer and have also had a conversation last week with a colleague friend who spoke of similar things. 

Without sounding too dramatic, it's big dramatic, often life changing experiences that either bring people closer or further apart. 

Steph and I were both 11/12 when our respective mothers popped out another turkey. We each had new brothers. Mine is my only brother while this was Steph's second brother. (I also have a sister). I still have pictures of when she brought her baby brother to school, it was the good old days of elements school. (She didn't bring Jason in on her own, her mother Barbara was there too)

It's funny because to date I don't remember us having that many conversations about our baby brothers but that was probably because we were both too busy changing their diapers. We are both the eldest of 3 and very responsible. 

The birth of the boys was a nice thing to have in common but it was the events in our later life, that to me, are the glue to our friendship. 

Quick Camino digression. Linda a Camino friend told me something that feels so true. It's such a simple statement. - There are only 2 kinds people in life. Those that show up, and those that don't.

When I was about 16 some bad family shit went down. Stephanie and Ashley were there less than hour after the ambulance had left. (Big story guys, that will never be blogged, so don't wait for it)

Oh and Ashley is my sisters best friend from possibly the age of 4 or 5.

I was also around/ish throughout Barbara's unsuccessful battle with the big C. She died of a brain tumor. I was already in London for all of this but I called Steph a lot and when I was in Montreal I saw her and her mom. When Barbara died I was so close to going to the funeral, but Canada is a tad bit far at times and last minute flights aren't cheap.

I have been there for some more fun times too, I went back for Stephanie wedding. I visited her first newborn about 10 days after he was born and then flew back a few moths later for his baptism. Last year I made it to Abu Dhabi to see baby number 2 although he more of a toddler then.

So anyways folks, in a few hours time I'll be making more memories with my oldest friend and her 2 very handsome sons. (3 & 5 ish)

When of the best things about talking to someone who knows you, is they know all the shit that got you to where you are. It's not all shit either, some of it is really good to.

Shout it out.... or damn well try

Do you ever have one of those moments when you want to shout just to let it out? I’ve never been a shouter or a screamer. I’ve always just been a walker. Instead of shouting it out I would just walk it out….

If I still feel like this in the morning I’m going to walk to work. This is good for so many reasons. I’m off to Italy on Thursday morning and I feel like a Canadian moose. I actually think I might even resemble one right now too. It’s tough being a girl especially when I love food and have a fantastic wardrobe that happens to be about a dress size or 2 smaller than what I actually am. Luckily for me I can loose it quickly enough if I put my mind to it. Back to walking, it’s also a fantastic time to think.

One of the things I need to decide is, when am I getting back on to my yellow brick road. (The Camino de Santiago)

I want to do the whole thing again. Originally when I walked it the first time I told myself that I should do this every 10 years. I thought that sounded like a great milestone and a good round number. Now only 5 years have passed and I feel that I need to do it again. I can’t even explain why I NEED to do it again but I do. I just do.

The first time around it was so incredibly special. I know it will be different this time but I hope it will still be special in a new way. I called Rebekah in Spain last night and spoke to her for 45 minutes.  She was very adamant and clear when she told me it will be different. New things will come up as I walk, this is probably a very good thing.

Back to actually doing it again. Do I walk the French route or should I try another one. The French route is the most popular and the most catered for, however there are so many other routes that are apparently even more beautiful and untouched. Then this fear comes over me again. I was scared shitless the first time and the idea of doing another route is terrifying. I hate being scared and if I could grow a pair I would. (Just joking! I’m happy being a girl)

Reb suggested walking upwards (also know as North but you get me) walk up. This route is called Via de la Plata from Sevilla via Salamanca to Santiago de Compostela.  Actually as I’m typing these words I feel calmer. This might be the answer.

But before I jump on the bandwagon I have to remember a few more things. I actually have a job that I still need to make the occasionally appearance. I really need to look at my annual leave and see what I can manage to take off and when. I’ll be in Portugal for a week and maybe instead of flying back I could just take a train from Faro to Sevlille on the 17^th of August. Most people would melt walking in that kind of heat but I’m pretty sure that I’ll be ok. The next thing I need to really think about is that most of the Spanish people have August off. They too will be walking and the path will be busy.

Another thing that I need to factor is a recent invitation to spend some time in an old farm house in France with Rebekah and friends. I don’t know any of them but that’s never stopped me.

Oh… and back to the annual leave thing. I need to factor in that I actually have a family that love me. Yet I almost never ever go visit any of them... (I’ll think about that too when I walk)

On a final note – I’m going to try and get back to writing more regularly. I find it therapeutic and it’s a nice way to vent, ponder and think out loud. I read a great book a few years ago that talks about writing a journal and how it gives you the answers to the questions you have. Journaling is more personal but even this helps. I do highly recommend the book. It’s called WritingDown Your Soul: How to Activate and Listen to the Extraordinary Voice Within byJanet Conner.

Be good kids and be kind to one another

xx

It's been a while....

What can I say... Where have I been.

Well that's far too much to update on but life seems to be taking an interesting turn without me having to do a great deal. 

What do I mean with such a vague statement....let me try and explain. 

The last few years (4) I have almost always has regular things in the diary after work. Items such as classes, volunteering, meeting friends etc. Now after what feels like a long time, things are slowly dropping off. Some drop offs have been easier than others, but all in all its just happening with little effort on my side.

This might sound a little airy fairy, especially for the non believers but I feel like all this space in my life is being created for something or someone. Who knows.... Watch this space. 

Eating Animals - Jonathan Safran Foer

Racism in 2013...... Seriously?

I'm seriously pissed off and I'm hoping that blogging about this will make feel a tiny bit better.

 
Basic background: I volunteer weekly at a London hospital. I have so, for almost 4 years now.
 
I'm in the isolation room with a fellow volunteer, the patient and her parents.
 
We are entertaining the patient and also having a friendly chat with the parents. Normal small talk and they explain that they have been transferred to this hospital because there was a superbug outbreak in their previous hospital that forced wards to shut. I then ask if other patients from that hospital are here too? The mother replies, “Yes,  one that needs a bone marrow transplant.”
 
I then tell them something that I'm extremely proud of. "Oh, I'm on the bone marrow registry"
 
The father then replies, “It's very painful you know!”
 
I come back with, “Yes I know but I'm happy to endure pain for about 8 days if I've then contributed in saving someone's life. Also my body will replenish the marrow so really it's a win win situation”
 
He then replies, “No I’ll never do it... maybe I would do it for my (son/daughter).... ok I would do it, but only on the conditions that I would give it to an English person.”
 
What the fuck is that all about! If any of you know me I could have really given him a mouth full. I wanted to ask him what his definition is of an English person. Is that someone who is born in England... Or is that a white person born in England of English heritage. Who the fuck knows?
 
This man is sick and twisted and we didn't need to spend an extra second there.
 
We (my fellow volunteer ad I) progressed our evening and spent time with other patients and families.
 
After seeing another 4 patients, my blood was still boiling about what had just happened so I spoke to the nurse near by. I explained that he was racist and that maybe that family should remain in a private single room to save the potential grief that other families may have to put up with. The nurse agreed with me and told me I needed to tell the other nurse in the previous bay.
 
When speaking to her she confirmed that they too were finding him rather difficult and she apologised for what had happened. I told her it wasn't her fault that he is the one with a problem but that it would be a real shame if he made other patients and families upset.
 
As I'm writing this I'm not sure what it is specifically that's upsetting me.
 
Is it because he doesn't like my skin colour or my colleagues for that matter?
 
Is it because this is 2013 and this is United Kingdom & Great Britain?
 
Is it because if was sick I wouldn’t want his racist bone marrow?
 
Who knows.... I guess I'm just disappointed with the situation as whole. I've endured ignorant stupid people my whole life but I wish it would stop.
 
For my final closing notes. 

Firstly the Anthony Nolan Trust is an amazing trust and if you register and then happen to donate you have no say in who it goes to. You will not meet that person. (After 2 years if both parties agree they can meet but this normally doesn’t happen)

This entire experience reminds me of a chain mail that was going around years ago. There are various variations but below is one I found that gives you the gist. I was thinking of this when walking out of the hospital side room.  

A white woman arrived at her seat and saw that the passenger next to her was a black man. Visibly furious, she called the air hostess.

"What's the problem, madam?" the hostess asked her

"Can't you see?" the lady said - "I was given a seat next to a black man. I can't seat here next to him. You have to change my seat"

"Please, calm down, madam" - said the hostess "Unfortunately, all the seats are occupied, but I'm still going to check if we have any."

The hostess left and returned some minutes later.

"Madam, as I told you, there isn't any empty seat in this class- economy class. But I spoke to the captain and he confirmed that there isn't any empty seats in the economy class. We only have seats in the first class." And before the woman said anything, the hostess continued "Look, it is unusual for our company to allow a passenger from the economy class change to the first class. However, given the circumstances, the commandant thinks that it would be a scandal to make a passenger travel sat next to an unpleasant person." And turning to the black man, the hostess said: "Which means, Sir, if you would be so nice to collect your hand luggage, we have reserved you a seat in the first class..."

And all the passengers nearby, who were shocked to see the scene started applauding, some standing on their feet.

What I hear on the tube

So I've just been on the tube for the last 20 minutes listening to a young couple in their 20's.

It's quite amusing. They work at the same company and its obvious by their conversation that she stayed at his for the first time last night.

While the rest of London is trying to get to work these two are trying to establish basic things like 'so, where do you live?, How long have you been at the company?'

I was seriously trying my best to not laugh at them.

Then she goes on about how she is only going to be 30 minutes late work after she goes shopping first. She needs to buy clothes so that she doesn't look like a dirty stop out.

I'm not judging that they shagged, or that they don't know each other, or that she doesn't have clothes to wear to work.

My gripe is having to listen to the whole thing.

(Look, we've all had to buy emergency clothing at times in our lives. If you haven't, then you haven't lived)

The difference here is.... I didn't go out and tell the world!!

My rant is over!

ps. Lets hope that they remembered to use protection!

Driving tips for Londoners

Right! So this entry is absolutely necessary for those who are in experienced driving in the snow, ice or slush. Aka most Londoners

The rules according to moi:

1. Clear your car of snow! That means all the snow, not just tiny patches around the windows. This includes the roof of the car. When driving at fast speeds the snow on the roof either ends up on someone else's windshield or often on the rear glass of your own car.

2. Switch on the lights at all times in the winter. It makes it easier for others to see you.

3 When having to break. Pump your breaks. Pump pump pump! Don't slam the breaks. You'll soon be surprised where you end up.

4. Most cars these days have ABS. Read up on it and use this in your favour.

5. When starting a new journey. Start your car first ( make sure it's in a safe gear) while you shovel a path for your car to get out. Yes! You heard me correctly.... Shovel a path out.

6. Don't be an idiot and flood your car with gas when it's not moving. The reason it's not moving is because its stuck dumbass!

7. When driving and if you loose control don't for the love of god over correct yourself. You'll end up in a ditch killing yourself or someone else. Stay calm, breath, and steer along slowly towards the original direction but don't suddenly think you are batman and you can get out of this situation as quick as you entered it.

Happy driving folks.
When ever in doubt. Ask moi...

xx